beyond understanding

Audre Lorde reminds me to speak, not only to speak but to speak better.

Reading When I Dare To Be Powerful by Audre Lorde

This post is not about the book, it’s just to a nod to what prompted me today.

More specifically… this call to action…

For those of us who write, it is necessary to scrutinize not only the truth of what we speak, but the truth of that language by which we speak it. For others, it is to share and spread also those words that are meaningful to us. But primarily for us all, it is necessary to teach by living and speaking those truths which we believe and know beyond understanding. Because in this way alone we can survive, by taking part in a process of life that is creative and continuing, that is growth. – When I Dare To Be Powerful by Audre Lorde

I want to write about the things. I will write about the things soon. I have written about the things. I have not shared the things. I do live in fear Audre. I have and must share the things. Some people will say that you don’t need to make your art that personal, they ask, why put yourself in a vulnerable position? Well, like Audre says, I’ll still be in that vulnerable position regardless of if I say it or not, I’ll still be there.

I have to share the things. But not tonight, god no. I need to sleep.

I am so grateful for today

I’ve had such a nice day. I had a good day at work, I got to see a guy I like, read and look at the moon. today was great, there is much I am thankful for, which is why I need to write.

I’ll sleep and then write about it.

Now I would like to dream about how perfect today was, and not think about the past. I’d like to think about this reality that happened today and how lovely it was. How I let myself be more me, how I am still so open for this beauty to come in.

And yes, I will write about the darkness, like I have so many times. But I feel like I need to write about that harsh reality in a more impactful way, it needs to be done to upmost seriousness, with the upmost respect, in a language that you would understand.